Anxiety
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation,
by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
(Philippians 4:6 NIV)
Anxiety—that horrible, gnawing feeling in the pit of your stomach that churns up your insides. I had come through, or I thought I had come through, a horrible three-year period of loss, trauma, and change, but then, out of the blue, came the anxiety attacks. They struck always in the early hours of the morning, between three and five. I had never experienced anything like this before-waking up to a sense of impending doom and darkness. And I knew it wasn’t rational. I had no reason to feel this way.
The situation grew worse when I started waking up in the night in fear of the impending anxiety attack. So, I was now anxious about getting anxious! Awesome—just what I needed to complete the miserable picture. Anxiety has a nasty habit of bringing its companions along—panic, fear, and dread. An unholy trinity of misery.
I soon discovered I was not the only one dealing with this issue. People around me were going through, or had gone through, the same thing but were too scared to speak out or ask for help because they thought they would be perceived as weak or neurotic. It’s a dark valley to walk through alone, so I decided I needed to share my experience.
The good news is we are not walking through the valley alone. God is right there with us, leading us through and bringing us out. He brings us THROUGH the valley—THROUGH. He doesn’t leave us in it.
Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me (Psalm 23:4 NIV).
But it won’t be without a battle. The Enemy wants you to think you are a weak Christian because you are not standing on the Word and overcoming the situation, that it is never going to end, that you are always going to feel that way, that you’re going crazy. Those are all lies. Jesus warned us that Satan is “the father of lies.” And he is darned good at lying. He has had eons to perfect his craft. But the good news is he is a defeated enemy. He was defeated decisively and permanently at the cross. The victory is already won. Jesus did it for you.
God knows we are going to struggle with anxiety; that it will come at some point in our lives. If He did not anticipate this occurring within us, He would not have put so many scriptures about anxiety in His word.
When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought me joy (Psalm 94:19 NIV).
Even Jesus battled with anxiety. Look at His lonely figure in the garden of Gethsemane, on His knees in agony, sweating blood, and asking God to take the cup away from Him. But He entrusted His fears to His Heavenly Father and His Father brought Him through.
I wish I could tell you my personal battle was won in an instant. It wasn’t. It took time. The attacks grew less and less intense, and the time span between them grew longer. The prescription that worked for me was listening to praise and worship music in the dark early morning hours and holding onto scripture when the cloud descended.
At the beginning, when the attacks were severe, I also accepted help in the form of medication which took the edge off and allowed me to sleep. You need to get rest because exhaustion just makes the situation worse. I was able to stop taking the medication as things improved.
Don’t be super-spiritual about getting medical help. Sometimes it is needed. Whichever path you choose, medication or no medication, do not heap condemnation on those who follow the other path. Do what is needed in your situation.
There is one thing I do know, and I have absolutely no doubt about this. He brought me through it, and He will bring you through it too. There is light at the end of your tunnel. Just keep walking, clinging to His hand, and you will emerge into the sunshine again.
So, do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand (Isaiah 41:10 NIV). Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid (John 14:27 NIV).
